


Down

by trashm0uth



Category: Suicide Boy - ParkGee (Webcomic)
Genre: M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:13:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23485111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashm0uth/pseuds/trashm0uth
Summary: Hooni attempts suicide multiple times, but one attempt is more successful than all the others. Will Jaehoon and Soorim be able to save him, or will Hooni end up 6 feet under?
Relationships: Kim Jaehoon/Lee Hooni
Comments: 10
Kudos: 107





	1. Sorry Can’t Save Me Now.

**Author's Note:**

> I added characters to the story. I did not know what Hooni’s father’s name was, so I made it up. Enjoy. Read at your own discretion.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hooni tries to hang himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title from “listen before i go” by Billie Eilish.

Hooni stood on the stool, sloppy noose hanging tight around his neck, blood stains above his lip. He stared out his window at the January moon, remembering the previous week’s events. He tried his best to block them out, but of course, he could not. He didn’t want to do what he was going to do, but he had run out of options; he had been pushed over the edge. His tears blurred his vision slightly as he reached for his scissors.  
He told himself he wouldn’t chicken out this time as he threw his pair of scissors to the ground. He looked skyward, taking in what he hoped would be his last breath. He adjusted the uneven rope around his neck, making it tighter. He didn’t want, or need, his death to be romanticized. He just needed to leave the earth before anybody found out what happened to him. He looked at the ground, then let his feet slide forward as he knocked the stool over.  
The pain was excruciating. He tried to scream but he only choked out a crackly whimper. He could feel his lungs searching for air, to no avail. His eyes started to dim and his vision blackened as he grabbed for the rope around his neck, his sweaty palms slipping off of the noose. Just as he was starting to black out, he heard a knock at the door.  
“Hooni? It’s Soorim and Jaehoon! We stopped by for a ‘Happy 2020’ study session!”  
Shit.  
————————————————————————————————————————————  
“Hooni! Don’t make me get the keys!” Soorim chirped. Hooni tried to muffle his choked cries as much as possible, but his body and brain were shutting down. He heard the footsteps of the presumed Soorim and Jaehoon stamp away from the door. He knew where they were going: they were getting the keys.  
Jaehoon didn’t leave the door; he felt there was something off about the atmosphere today; the air felt thick and cold. He let Soorim get the keys while he watched the door. Soorim returned about thirty seconds later with a pair of keys that he slid into the door lock. He turned them and the door creaked open.  
As soon as Soorim saw what was inside, he dropped the keys. Jaehoon’s eyes widened and he went slack-jawed.  
Hoon Lee was hanging, blood streaming from his nose. His eyes were rolled back into his head; his hands and legs were shaking in spasmodic bursts. His fingers were curled up, grabbing the air autonomously. His left leg was bent over the right one, occasionally moving to try, and fail, to step on or kick something and get some air. He could no longer control his movements as his brain was only focused on getting oxygen in his body.  
Jaehoon spotted some scissors lying on the ground beneath Hooni.  
“Hooni!” He lunged for the scissors and began cutting at the rope.  
“H-Hyeung!” Soorim choked out through his sobs. He wanted to help, but he was in a state of shock. As Jaehoon was cutting Hooni down, a small hand suddenly swatted at him. Jaehoon looked up at a tearful Hooni, who was gritting his teeth and wiping at the blood below his nose, and trying his best to swat the scissors away from Jaehoon.  
This was the last straw; Jaehoon’s eyes overflowed with tears as he let his strong facade fall away at the seams.  
“H-Hooni,” he choked out. “W-why?” He finally cut the rope, catching the small boy in the process.  
Hooni’s lungs naturally took in a large portion of oxygen, his coughs making it difficult to get any air at all. Hooni’s cheeks were stained with blood and tears. His nose was still bleeding when Jaehoon cut him down.  
Soorim rushed over to Lee Hoon and Jaehoon, sweat and tears streaming down his cheeks and neck. Soorim touched Hooni’s face and knelt down next to Jaehoon and Hooni, the smaller boy weakly looking up at him.  
“Why,” Soorim sobbed. “Why would you do this?” Hooni just smiled weakly. He lifted a shaky finger and pointed over to a small photo: too small to be seen from a distance. Soorim stood up and walked over to the picture.  
It was a photorealistic painted portrait of an unfamiliar man. He was well built and had a grey beard matched with a husky face; he was wearing a dark blue beanie and a red flannel. He had a Bud Light in his left hand, and he was holding a coaster in his right hand.  
Soorim turned to Jaehoon and Hooni, his brows furrowed in confusion; Jaehoon was hunched over Hooni’s now unconscious body. Soorim assumed that Hooni would tell him about the painting when he woke up. For now, he would stay with him until he woke up. Soorim put a hand on Jaehoon’s back.  
“I… I feel like a failure,” Jaehoon sniffled through clenched teeth. He still held Hooni in his arms, as if he was unable to set him down for fear of his small, underweight body crumbling and falling apart. Soorim had never seen him like this; he always assumed that Jaehoon kept a firm hold on his dignity wherever he was. He always assumed he kept his guard up no matter where he was. Soorim, on the other hand, had no problem expressing his emotions in front of others. He could laugh, cry, scream, all without problem. But every time he tried to remain strong, he would see the soft sadness in Jaehoon’s eyes, and he would break down again.  
“You aren’t a failure,” Soorim sat down next to Jaehoon. Jaehoon was holding on tight to Hooni’s body, his nails unintentionally digging into the small boy’s skin. Jaehoon turned his tearful gaze to Soorim. His eyes were glazed over like pottery, and he had a pinkish glow to his irritated and flushed nose and cheeks.  
“Why am I such an imbecile?!” Jaehoon pulled Hooni’s head into his chest, wrapping his body around him. Hooni’s legs were draped around Jaehoon’s waist, and his arms were limp at his sides. The small boy’s head was held by both of Jaehoon’s hands; his slender fingers grasping at the other boy’s scruffy black hair.  
Then something clicked in Soorim’s brain: Jaehoon had feelings for Hooni. He felt connected to him, and didn’t want to lose him; he had always pushed him away for fear of either losing him, or being perceived as strange. He was crushed by Hooni’s attempted suicide because he felt like a failed friend. He felt like he was responsible.  
How had I not seen it before? Soorim thought, wiping at his clouded eyes.  
___________________________________________________  
Soorim slept on the couch after exhaustion got the best of his body. Jaehoon, however, did not sleep that night. He just laid down on the floor, still cradling Hooni. Hooni’s head still rested against Jaehoon’s chest. Gentle breaths were taken in and out of Hooni’s halfway parted lips, reassuring Jaehoon that he was still alive.


	2. Don’t Ask Questions You Don’t Wanna Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehoon gets interested in Hooni’s past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I’m sorry this story was on hold  
> (title from “my strange addiction” by Billie Eilish.)

Morning came, and Soorim finally awoke. Jaehoon still lay awake, staring at the unmoving ceiling fan from which the half-cut noose still hung. Hooni was still asleep, gently breathing in shaky breaths and breathing out even shakier ones. Jaehoon hoisted the unconscious boy onto his shoulder.   
“We should stay with him until school starts again,” Jaehoon said, standing up. Soorim nodded, sitting up on the couch. Jaehoon laid Hooni down on a pre-pumped air mattress and then sat down next to Soorim.   
“I just don’t know what made him do it,” Soorim mumbled, breaking the silence. Jaehoon turned his gaze to the blonde boy next to him. Soorim brushed his dyed hair behind his freckled face.   
“Me either,” Jaehoon pushed his glasses up. He straightened his glossy black hair and sat back.  
“Do you think,” Soorim looked down in shame. “Do you think that it was our fault?” Jaehoon opened his mouth to say something, but then his mind fogged up and he could not think clearly.   
___________________________________________________  
“I’m only here to prove to your weak ass how strong I am!” The figure neared Hooni’s immobile body.   
“Please! Please don’t hurt me! I’ll do whatever you want,” Hooni cried fearfully. A sudden searing pain smashed through Hooni’s head as he was shoved to the ground. He felt his clothes being torn at, as if they were food for starving wolves. He could not move, or speak on his own. He could only feel his skin being penetrated and tugged at by the drunken figure before him, and the cold hard steel in his hands.  
___________________________________________________  
Hooni awoke with a gasp, tears and sweat dripping down his face. He clasped a cupped hand to his mouth, trying to muffle his pained cries. He fell back onto the pillow, staring at the ceiling fan, when something caught his eye: the top half of a severed noose, accompanied by the bottom half sitting on a chestnut stool. Hooni sat up, gaining the attention of Jaehoon and Soorim.   
“Oh, hyeung! You’re awake,” Soorim jolted up out of his seat. Hooni’s eyes widened when he saw the two boys begin to approach him. Jaehoon and Soorim sat down next to the small boy.   
“I’m, uhm, glad you’re alive,” Jaehoon mumbled. Hooni looked down in shame and embarrassment. He stood up, looking at the two boys.   
“So, what is this portrait?” Soorim handed Hooni the painting. Hooni’s whole world broke in two. His hands began to shake, sweat dripped down his face as the panic attack took its form. His breathing became unhinged and uneven as he stared at the portrait he painted.   
“Uh,” he sputtered. Jaehoon’s brows furrowed in worry. He knew something had happened to Hooni, he just couldn’t put his finger on what.   
“You okay?” Soorim asked, reading the room better than usual. Soorim put a hand on Hooni’s shoulder.   
___________________________________________________  
Hooni was in his apartment, but the shadow was there too. It had pinned him to the ground, his body now useless and immobile. No matter how much Hooni cried for help, nobody came to his rescue. The shadow was on top of his back, practically suffocating him. His arms were pinned in front of him, his legs useless beneath the shadow. He felt the shadow scratch and graze his skin; he felt it tear away at his flesh, consuming the blood that spilled from his veins.  
___________________________________________________  
Hooni dropped the portrait onto the air mattress, hugging himself. He cupped a hand over his mouth, tears streaming down his cheeks.   
“H-Hooni?” Soorim pulled his hand back. Hooni fell to his knees next to the portrait. He picked it up with shaky hands, examining the man he painted. Such precision. Skill. Talent. Wasted.   
“T-This is m-my uncle. His name is Chul,” Hooni sniffled. “He sent me care packages for a while when I left my h-home. But, uhm,” Hooni choked, fighting flashbacks. “Well, he got sent to j-jail. I don’t know why,” he lied. “But he was released a little bit ago. I-I planned to give him this when he was released, but I couldn’t reach him through a phone number or email.”  
“Then one day, he just, like, shows up at my door. So I let him in, but he was clearly high, or something. I tried to get him to leave after he asked me where my mother was, fully knowing that she died years ago,” Hooni choked on his words. “But he seemed adamant that he stayed. So I told him I wanted to give him something and that I would go get it, but,” Hooni paused, thinking about what he should say next.   
“He went berserk. I… he…” Hooni stopped. He wanted to tell his friends, but he just couldn’t get the words out. And another part of him didn’t want to be looked at as a freak. He was weird and weak as it was, and he didn’t need more to add onto it.   
“What happened?” A concerned Soorim asked. Jaehoon was smart. Smarter than most of the teachers at his school. And being intelligent, his brain started connecting the dots of what happened to Hooni.   
“I apologize,” Jaehoon stood up. “I have to tell my mother where I am. I was supposed to do that an hour ago. I’ll be right back. I’m just going to text her,” Jaehoon scrambled towards the bathroom. He shut and locked the door, then pulled his phone out.   
He searched for a popular public records website and quickly signed in. He then entered Hooni’s uncle’s name, Chul Lee. The results were processed, with various warnings of this is full of real public records and criminal charges. Proceed? But Jaehoon proceeded. And when the results popped up, Jaehoon’s face drained of blood.   
(Name: Lee, Chul  
Age: 46  
Offenses: use of illegal drugs, battery, physical abuse, aggravated assault, domestic violence, attempted murder  
Status: Felon  
Victims: Lee, Hoon  
Summary of the crime:  
Chul Lee confessed at 12:30 PM, December 30th, 2014, to assaulting his seventeen year old nephew, Hoon Lee, on December 27th, 2019. He reportedly injected heroin into him after repeatedly smashing his head with a bottle until he went unconscious. Reports stated that Chul slashed Hoon’s neck in attempt to murder him. Chul Lee revealed the name of his brother, Kyong, who was Hoon’s father, and who participated in physically abusive acts with Chul. Chul Lee was later sentenced to prison, but released due to an appeal.)   
Jaehoon frantically searched the website for Kyong Lee, Hooni’s father.   
(Name: Lee, Kyong  
Age: 37  
Offenses: child abuse, physical abuse, domestic violence, drug abuse, aggravated assault, use of illegal drugs  
Status: Felon  
Victims: Lee, Hoon  
Summary of the crime:  
Kyong Lee confessed at 1:42 PM, December 30th, 2014, to repeatedly beating and drugging his now seventeen year old son, Hoon Lee. The assaults reportedly began when his son was seven years old. He says he would drug him to the point of unconsciousness, beat him and/or use inanimate objects to assault him. He was sentenced to twenty years in prison. He is still serving his sentence.)


	3. announcement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is just an announcement

Hey, I just wanted to let y’all know that this work is being discontinued. I didn’t want to leave anyone hanging in case you expected more.


End file.
